Saturday, October 24, 2020

Why when bad things happen it can actually be a good thing

Usually when something bad happens to us, depending on what it it, our first reaction is to be upset, angry, annoyed, or sad. No one likes when bad things happen to them but inevitably they are a part of life. One might think, wouldn't it be nice if life was perfect and no bad things ever happened? That sounds great at first, but actually it might not be a good as it sounds.

When it comes to good and bad, they both exist in relation to the other. We know when things are good because we have the knowledge of when things have not been so good. Same goes for bad, we understand when things are bad because we know how they are when they are good. This is an important concept to keep in mind when something in life is bothering us.

Take the first example and imagine a life where everything is perfect and no bad things happen. It seems like it would be great, but in actuality, if everything was good at all times, then it wouldn't be good, it would be average. Because people would be used to everything being good, it would become normal and they would take it for granted, so to them life would just seem regular and not necessarily good.

To expand on this example, consider the weather. If it was a calm 72 degrees and sunny every day, that sounds pretty good to us because we have the understanding that the weather is not always like that. Some days it is cold, cloudy, raining, and windy. So when the weather gets better and it is comfortable and sunny, we appreciate it. If the weather was like that every day, we wouldn't appreciate it because we would get used to it and end up taking it for granted.

In another example, say there is a person who lives in a very beautiful part of the world. They have lived there all their life so they are used to it and it is just what they experience every day. Because of this, they may not consider it to be anything special. Then someone comes to visit from a far away country where the environment is not nearly as beautiful. When they get to the destination they are amazed at how wonderful it looks and they express this feeling to the person who lives there. The local resident is confused why this person seems to think it is so amazing, because to them, this is what they see every day. The perspective makes all the difference.

Another common story to illustrate this concept is when someone experiences a near death situation like a car accident. Before the incident happened, they may have been in a rut, maybe not very motivated, maybe not that happy with their life, just kind of living the same routine every day. Then an accident happens where they almost lose their life, but luckily they survive. After recovery, they have a renewed perspective on life. They realize tomorrow is not guaranteed so you have to make the most of each day. They become more motivated and and excited to live life to the fullest. Sure an accident is terrible and no one wants to experience something like that, but when it does happen, it puts things into perspective and can actually have a positive effect in the long run.

When something bad happens, instead of just feeling down about it, use it as a learning experience. Think about what happened and what you have now learned from it so that you can prevent something like that from happening again. Realize that these things serve as a reset on our perspective so that we can fully appreciate when things are going good.

It can be hard to keep this perspective in mind especially in the moment, but if you can remember this concept, it can really help you deal with life when things are not going your way. Instead of feeling annoyed, angry, or upset, when something happens, use the opportunity to remember that this is a part of life and without bad, there is no good.

Thursday, October 1, 2020

People That Hit Their Car Doors into Other People's Cars

Today drove to a restaurant to pick up an order of food and since I arrived a little early I decided to wait in my car before going in. I parked far enough away so there was an open parking spot on each side. As I was sitting there some guy pulls in next to me. He then proceeds to open his door and hit my car with his door.

Now I am not a confrontational person and it didn't seem like the hit was too bad so I basically ignored it even though I was annoyed by it. The guy goes into the store and comes back 5 minutes later while I am still there. I'm thinking he better be extra careful this time right? He then proceeds to open his door and hits my car door again!

I really should have said something at that point but in the moment, I did not want to start a confrontation. He leaves and I go out and check the car door. I didn't noticed any significant damage which was a relief. I have an older car and while I keep it in good condition, the paint does have a fair amount of minor nicks here and there so even if it got one more, it would not be a big deal, but still it does not excuse this guys actions.

You might think someone with a junky car who doesn't care about anyone else might be the kind of person to do something like this, but he had a nice car! Were talking a new Lexus SUV that was in good condition, and he is just hitting his car door into other people's cars like that!

I'm not sure what to make of it. Maybe the guy didn't care, maybe he is just inconsiderate. The thing is, if something like this happens once, it it an accident. I get it, accidents happen. But twice in a row? That is unacceptable.

If I accidentally opened my car door into someone else's car while they were sitting in it, I would be so embarrassed. And you know if I had to go back 5 minutes later and get back into my car I would be super careful not to do it again. But this guy did it again which boggles my mind.

I always look for a lesson to be learned when things like this happen. In this case I think the lesson is that you really can't park near other people because there is a chance they might be like this guy and open their door into your car. I even parked with open spaces on each side and it still happened so I think I may have to start parking even further away to prevent this kind of thing from happening again.

I do wonder what would have happened if I confronted him. I think I could have gone up to him and said, “Hey you just hit my car twice. Please be more careful when you open your door.” I wonder what his reaction would have been. I would guess he would probably say sorry, but you never know how people are going to react and sometimes it is best not to take the chance of getting yourself into a bad situation.

I know part of owning a car and having to park it in a parking lot is the fact that it might get dinged up by other cars. I accept that so I'm not too bothered by it, but the fact that this guy hit my car twice, while I was sitting in it, is just unbelievable. After it happened and I was milling it over in my mind, I told myself if anything I'm going to get a blog post out of this!