Saturday, October 24, 2020

Why when bad things happen it can actually be a good thing

Usually when something bad happens to us, depending on what it it, our first reaction is to be upset, angry, annoyed, or sad. No one likes when bad things happen to them but inevitably they are a part of life. One might think, wouldn't it be nice if life was perfect and no bad things ever happened? That sounds great at first, but actually it might not be a good as it sounds.

When it comes to good and bad, they both exist in relation to the other. We know when things are good because we have the knowledge of when things have not been so good. Same goes for bad, we understand when things are bad because we know how they are when they are good. This is an important concept to keep in mind when something in life is bothering us.

Take the first example and imagine a life where everything is perfect and no bad things happen. It seems like it would be great, but in actuality, if everything was good at all times, then it wouldn't be good, it would be average. Because people would be used to everything being good, it would become normal and they would take it for granted, so to them life would just seem regular and not necessarily good.

To expand on this example, consider the weather. If it was a calm 72 degrees and sunny every day, that sounds pretty good to us because we have the understanding that the weather is not always like that. Some days it is cold, cloudy, raining, and windy. So when the weather gets better and it is comfortable and sunny, we appreciate it. If the weather was like that every day, we wouldn't appreciate it because we would get used to it and end up taking it for granted.

In another example, say there is a person who lives in a very beautiful part of the world. They have lived there all their life so they are used to it and it is just what they experience every day. Because of this, they may not consider it to be anything special. Then someone comes to visit from a far away country where the environment is not nearly as beautiful. When they get to the destination they are amazed at how wonderful it looks and they express this feeling to the person who lives there. The local resident is confused why this person seems to think it is so amazing, because to them, this is what they see every day. The perspective makes all the difference.

Another common story to illustrate this concept is when someone experiences a near death situation like a car accident. Before the incident happened, they may have been in a rut, maybe not very motivated, maybe not that happy with their life, just kind of living the same routine every day. Then an accident happens where they almost lose their life, but luckily they survive. After recovery, they have a renewed perspective on life. They realize tomorrow is not guaranteed so you have to make the most of each day. They become more motivated and and excited to live life to the fullest. Sure an accident is terrible and no one wants to experience something like that, but when it does happen, it puts things into perspective and can actually have a positive effect in the long run.

When something bad happens, instead of just feeling down about it, use it as a learning experience. Think about what happened and what you have now learned from it so that you can prevent something like that from happening again. Realize that these things serve as a reset on our perspective so that we can fully appreciate when things are going good.

It can be hard to keep this perspective in mind especially in the moment, but if you can remember this concept, it can really help you deal with life when things are not going your way. Instead of feeling annoyed, angry, or upset, when something happens, use the opportunity to remember that this is a part of life and without bad, there is no good.

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